it was a nice christian god's birthday!

i made bread with ross. had dinner with some atheists. and watched some movies. me and elena kana! andreas and i watched bad santa. which was bad, even with the happy ending. it made for a nice day, actually. i didn’t even realize it was christmas and that was nice. it is such a wasted day for me. like easter weekend in germany if you haven’t made plans to get out of town.

while ross and i were making bread i suddenly decided i wanted to make a coffee cake. but then i discovered that i was under a mistaken impression. coffee cakes don’t have coffee in them. they are a type of cake you eat with coffee. so then i searched for coffee cake with coffee in it and found this awesome link!
coffee cake literally
the comments are hysterical and though it seems like there is probably 100 calories per slice (1 POUND of powdered sugar in the frosting) it sounds fabulous. i am going to make it tomorrow (er, later today)

i got a scary letter in the mail recently. it was a letter saying “if you lost your job with hewlett packard company between X/2009 and Y/2012 you may be eligible for a federal training program called TAA! you should sign up for unemployment and the program at your local workforce solution office.” the scary part? i am already IN that program. so why are they sending me this document? did i get kicked-out? was there an accidental key stoke? i called and left a message for my representative. she sent me an email saying “look at that you qualify for this new petition, and it has better benefits. i am going to try and move you to it”. i liked that as an answer. though some of me worries that the system is working right now, we shouldn’t mess with it. but whatever. i’ll just deal with it when it comes.

i estimated my taxes tonight. even if i don’t get the education credit i think i should get. if i just on straight income, deductions and tax rate, i should break even and not owe anything. yeah!! if i get the tax credit, i’ll get $2000 back. i am going to look into the health care tax credit again. i should be getting that and it would reduce my taxable liability even more! the more i get back, the better.

i spent a lot of money this year. way more than i should of. i had my good months and my bad. the beginning of the year was especially bad as i was paying my credit card bills to europe. things are more stable in my life now. my rent is way cheaper. if i can get my health insurance bill back down to $200 a month, i should have plenty of breathing room. plenty of money to finish my program. that is quite a relief. i have been worrying about money a lot lately. my spending habits have been coming down too. i do not expect any sympathy for my financial position. it has been my fault that i wasn’t able to rein in my spending as soon as i lost my job. but i know me pretty well, and i am happy where i have made it to now. and i am confident that i can make it through to the end of this program without running out of money and/or having a nervous break-down because of money concerns. (none of this means you can’t offer to pay my health, auto or renter’s insurance for me…that would just mean more money stays in my retirement…i just know if you don’t want to, my predicament is all mine)

so i guess i have a new to-do list…get my paperwork in for the health care tax credit, find new health insurance, bake a coffee cake with coffee in it and finish harry potter book 7. i have my work cut-out for me…the healthcare stuff will be a serious amount of work (thank-you health insurance company process vs. government program requirements)

things seem to be moving along is a positive manner for me (even if i did get that letter from financial aid saying i had timed out of my program…an obvious error) as this year comes to a close. when i look at myself in the mirror i see how much i have aged in the last year and a half. part of it is the weight i have gained, so hopefully, with my new year fitness plans, i can reverse some of it. but a lot of it is just the stress i have lived under with my life in such limbo. sure, i was confident i could do it. but at what price? and here i am now, getting into the groove. though i can’t say i hated 2010 (i did get into my program this year) i am looking forward to 2011 being a better, more efficient and relaxed version!

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