my last day as a homecare nurse at HA is friday.  the last number of weeks have been really good, actually.  i have only had 12 pts and they have been pretty stable.  it is a job i could do.  and i told my boss that.  well, in a staff mtg we were talking about caseload and i said that things are manageable at 12 and all my coworkers, who have more than that, agreed.  anyhow.  my stress level is way down now.  the kitties are gone.  optimus went to live with my friend holly and the capo went back to APA.  as long as i don’t think about him being alone in a cage wondering where his mommie is, i am fine.  but i think that, i start to cry.  like now. ross helped me take him to APA.  i took his toys and his food.  i showed the people that worked there all the stuff and then just fell apart.  i miss him, but my stress is so much better.  thank goodness i never had children.

baby steps.

took the popcorn off the ceiling of my bedroom, sanded it down, primed it and did two coats of red paint.  looks awesome.  my friend mark helped me.  he spent his entire weekend helping me.  he is nice like that.  he also wants to date me.  i feel guilty for sucking up his weekend and but SO appreciated his help.  i did rewire my ceiling lamp all myself.  was pretty proud of that (it is easy though).

i’d like to make plans for the holiday, but i have no idea what my schedule is going to be.  my “little sister” chelsea is coming to visit for christmas to new year’s.  i hope i have a bunch of time off.

perhaps i will take a long weekend and go visit a friend or two in CA.  i’d like a holiday.

my stress is better, even if my guilt seems to pile on more and more everyday.