more rejection

so a classmate got a call for an interview at the floor where i interviewed but didn’t get hired because it was “a tough decision” but there were only so many positions and they were now full. then 2 weeks later she gets a call for an interview. and she got it. she didn’t even WANT to work on a teley floor. i convinced her to go to the interview, if only for practice. at this point though, no one really turns down jobs.

i just feel lied to. another case of something being wrong with me but no one being willing to tell me what it is so i can try and fix it. i want to be happy for my classmates, but it is so hard. i think i am awesome. does all this rejection mean i am wrong? and do NOT say to me “it just means the right thing hasn’t come up”. what would be WRONG about a position at st david’s main? someone explain to me what i am doing wrong so i can change it and do it right. i just want to be wanted. it is the story of my life.

p.s. haven’t heard back from my dad. either he didn’t like my email (which seemed mild to me, i just answered some questions) or his wife won’t let him help me. oh well.

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